“Learn to Live Alone and Take Control of Your Relationships”

Discover the joy of independence: learn to live alone, enabling you to form relationships on your own terms, free from vulnerability.

Discovering Solitude

I have consistently relied on companionship throughout my life due to my upbringing, environment, and cultural background. The mere prospect of solitude would cause me sleepless nights.

This dependency has significantly impacted my relationships, acting as my Achilles’ heel, and everyone appeared aware of it except for myself. Some warned me about it, while others exploited it.


Further Reading:


The Downside of Relying Too Heavily on Companionship

When we are deeply attached to companionship and long for the company of others, we might find ourselves seeking solace in anyone who provides that sense of comfort. Sometimes, luck is on our side, and we meet someone who needs us just as much as we need them. But, let’s face it, such instances are few and far between.

More often than not, the manipulators find us – those of us hooked on companionship. They spot our weakness, exploit it, and then keep us under their control, feasting on our vulnerability.

Victims in this situation often face harsh emotional abuse. People take them for granted, use them, and mistreat them in shocking ways.

A Wake-Up Call:

An ex-partner of mine cleverly used my dependence on companionship to her benefit. Yet, as she prepared to leave, she told me, “You need to learn to live alone.” Her words felt like a curse. Why would I ever wish for solitude?

It took a few years, but eventually, I grasped the depth of her advice. I understand now that this dependence has been my greatest weakness.

My need for others’ company led me to latch onto anyone who offered a shred of comfort. My discomfort with solitude made me clingy, overly dependent, and emotionally distraught each time someone I leaned on decided to leave.

Alone Without Loneliness

By a twist of fate, I recently found myself alone in a foreign country, without family, friends, or my usual support system. Initially, the unfamiliarity almost triggered a panic attack. I yearned desperately for a familiar face, a conversation, or any semblance of my previous life.

But, astonishingly and thankfully, the power of solitude began to reveal itself. The revelation that I controlled my time and space was both novel and liberating. Suddenly, the craving for company vanished. I started to relish my newfound freedom.

It was an exhilarating experience. For the first time, I experienced solitude without a tinge of loneliness. I had never been so not lonely.

Unleashing Inner Strength

To borrow from Eda LeShan, “When we cannot bear to be alone, it means we do not properly value the only companion we will have from birth to death–ourselves.”

Finding peace within ourselves awards us an incredible superpower – the power to define who we want to be. You become the architect of your happiness and serenity.

When you’re comfortable in your own company, not anxiously seeking someone else’s, you gain the strength to stand firm and endure. It allows you to create relationships on your terms.

This strength and confidence in yourself shield you, creating a protective aura. You no longer give keys to your emotions to those who would exploit or undervalue you. 

Solitude: Your Launchpad to Resilience and Independence

Embrace and treasure your moments of solitude. Teach your children the beauty of enjoying their own company. It’s time to embark on this empowering journey and feel the peace within yourself.

Recognize your worth and help your children understand their value. This journey may take time, but every step is meaningful. It’s not about feeling alone but finding complete contentment within yourself. Through solitude, we uncover our true selves and discover our inner strength.

Valuing your alone time is a key to self-empowerment. Keep in mind embracing solitude leads to emotional resilience and independence. This journey is uniquely yours.

Stay aware, and don’t let your longing for companionship become a weakness others can exploit. You are more than enough, and your self-worth is unbreakable.

A dynamic personality with years of experience in the software industry and professional mainstream broadcasting. Now, he is dedicated to sharing his experiences about life, faith, and relationships to help others enable themselves to live a better life.

2 Comments

  1. Amal Siddiqui

    You wrote , “It’s not about feeling alone but finding complete contentment within yourself. Through solitude, we uncover our true selves and discover our inner strength.”
    I want to know the way, that make me feel content. Suppose I am alone and down, and missing my dependancy, which I am used to. How would I get rid of this feeling? Eventually I would end up either getting ill, depressed or finding another dependancy. Is there any way to get rid of it?

    Reply
    • Faisal Qureshi

      The most important aspect is to not seek out a new dependency.

      Its is like recovering from a drug addiction.

      It is a painful process, but if you can cross over, a beautiful life awaits you.

      Reply

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